The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
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