I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
