Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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