they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Randomize