When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize