remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
