Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Naked Twister starts at high noon
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
