she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
