kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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