The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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