I cockslap morals
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize