i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Randomize
