oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Randomize
