Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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