You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
