I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize