you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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