ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
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