M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize