Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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