i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
