i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
