why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
