I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
