oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
