thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
