just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Randomize