How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Randomize
