so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
