I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
i was born a porn star she said
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Randomize
