Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
not ubering you a puppy
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
wow bdsm is so cute
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
