I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
