I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Randomize
