I'm gonna have a badass scar
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
