went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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