i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
