Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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