I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Randomize
