He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
