your parents love me but you hate me
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
Randomize
