i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
