She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
