The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
My feet surprised me
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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