i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
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