she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
