And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize