Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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