three words: i give head
three words: not that well
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
