My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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