so that wasnt chicken after all
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
